Lately as I become more and more dedicated to my Mixed Family Life blog (previously The Mixed Mama Blog), and more and more people are checking it out, the negative comments are starting. Maybe that is a good thing right? All press is good press supposedly? One of the recent comments that was shared with me basically boiled down to the fact that I am white and I write about doing my biracial / multiracial / mixed race kids hair. Apparently I am too white to do my brown kids hair.
Too white to do my brown kids hair?
Maybe I am? Maybe I shouldn’t share with others the tips and tricks I’ve learned to manage my children’s hair and keep it healthy. Is this cultural appropriation? Is this me pretending to be something I’m not? Another comment had to do with the “audacity” of me sharing some recent strange stories that my husband and I experience as an interracial couple. The audacity?!
Yes I am a white woman. Yes I have brown kids. So what?!
But what I have to say to them is that I am writing about MY LIFE AND MY FAMILY. There can’t be a subject closer to my heart. I am white. I am a blonde haired, blue/green eyed Caucasian woman. Yes that is true. But guess what? This is my life. My reality. I have dedicated a big portion of my adult life to figuring out how to take care of my children’s hair and instill self-confidence in them. Why not share that with other parents? Especially if that can help them out.
Photo by City Lights Photography
Not all parents have access to learn hands-on how to take care of their multiracial children’s hair. Their hair usually is a different texture than what they are used to and it takes time and effort to learn. My goal has been, and always will be, to help other parents learn in a simple, down to earth manner. I don’t want them having their kids walking around crazy looking like I did until I made it my mission to learn.
So yes I am a white woman. Yes I have brown kids. So what?! I will share our stories. Share our tips & tricks. Attempt to help others and welcome them into our goofy lives. The color of my skin will not stop me. Hopefully it won’t stop you.
What are some of the craziest things somebody has said to you in regards to either your multiracial children or interracial relationship? Have you gotten negative comments about their hair? Let me know down below.
Thanks for reading!
Check out my previous post –> Surprising way to learn Black History.
Zo
A lady ran up to my daughter and I and asked if she was my child. My daughter stared daggers through the lady and walked away.
The Mixed Mama
I can’t believe people sometimes!!! :/
Trish Jo Staine
I was with my family in NYC and multiple times was referred to as the Nanny. Then when our whole family went to the wax museum, the staff person told me I had to wait and let the people behind me go in with their family. It was my husband and my sister-in-law.
Um. Yes. They’re MY kids.
The Mixed Mama
Oh my.. :/ That makes me so sad and angry! For so many reasons. Sometimes people make me so upset. You wish you could knock some sense into them! Lol.
Brandis
I had a man ask me a long time ago, “where did you get him?” Referring to my son! My response was a little inappropriate but unfortunately necessary!
The Mixed Mama
I swear some people have no manners! Like who raised him? Wow. :/
Misty B
I was in Walmart with 2 of my oldest (Mama of 4) babies and the cashier wouldn’t even speak to me upon me asking how her day was (she was a middle aged white lady). At the end of my purchase she asked “are you paying with food stamps”, I was shocked that was the first thing she said to me! I replied “no, I’m paying cash”. She made it a point not to even touch me when giving me change, she sat it all on the counter! She then says “by the way, how dare you bring kids into this world that will never have a place to belong “? Pissed beyond words I immediately went to management and thankfully the lady behind me heard her and she was fired.
The Mixed Mama
Oh.my.goodness!!!!! I’m so glad she got fired!!! The audacity!!!!! Where do you live if you don’t mind me asking? I am just so upset…. I can’t believe (well I can… unfortunately) that someone would act like that in front of kids and/or at work (or at all really!) Wow. You handled it better than I would’ve!
Mandy
My husband and I went into a gas station together, he went to the bathroom while I paid for gas. As I turned to walk away from the counter the manager came up to the cashier and loudly said (to them), “White women should NEVER be with black guys!” Needless to say we don’t go there anymore.
We also have people continually point out how different our kids look (one looks just like me, one looks just like him). Yes, they are both ours. No, we can’t control which genes our children inherit.
The Mixed Mama
Ugh!! People can be such racist jerks sometimes! It makes me so incredibly sad, especially since recently they seem so more empowered to be so outward with their hate. At least before people pretended to be nice. But I guess I’m also glad to know to be so much more aware now. You should’ve turned around and said something like “And you should NEVER open your mouth!” (super corny I know… I’m a cornball… lol!)
I have a FB group if you were interested in joining to socialize with other multiracial families — https://www.facebook.com/groups/TheMixedMamaCommunity Would love if you joined us <3
amymakalicom
Thank you for Sharing your tips, I love them, and some people will always complain no matter what. They would probably be mad if you DIDN’T take time to care for your kid’s hair. I am a asian/white mama of 3 mixed kids, and I have had a challenging time learning to care for their hair, so I am thankful for blogs like yours. Keep it up please!!!
The Mixed Mama
Aww thank you! I needed that today after a not so nice comment/thread was brought up again yesterday. Sometimes its hard to ignore the negative so I appreciate you sharing the positive. ♡ Thank you!